


Red Has Always Been My Favourite Color

by Confused_Host



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: 4 + 1 fic, Carmen Flores, I dunno man I just wanted to make something cool for Ender, M/M, Roman is kinda gay, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:22:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27082609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Confused_Host/pseuds/Confused_Host
Summary: Thomas isn’t the only person that falls in love at the mall. But, as a side, dealing with love is a lot harder than it is for humans. So Roman looks for the perfect moment to talk to this crimson cutie.Also called the 4 times Roman saw Carmen and the 1 time he did something about it.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders / Original Character, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Logic | Logan Sanders, Nico Flores/Thomas Sanders
Comments: 3
Kudos: 34





	Red Has Always Been My Favourite Color

**Author's Note:**

  * For [@Kiingz on tumblr](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=%40Kiingz+on+tumblr).



> @kiingz on tumblr made a post, and the tags said #i do be shipping carmen and roman because of the projection, And so, obviously, I had to write something so I can finally make content again.  
> Carmen is @nachosforfree‘s oc for Nico’s sides, as seen below! (I have just learned that technically Ender and Elliot/@iridescentmolars came up with Carmen, but how he looks is in the link)
> 
> https://confusedhost.tumblr.com/post/631774070509322240
> 
> Disclaimer: This intrulogical is only in the background. It's very clearly stated and does have a bit of plot importance (You can't miss it) but their relationship isn't the focus of the story.

1.

The first time Roman saw him was across the food court at the mall.

Roman could wax poetry of a faux setting and a romantic mood as much as he liked, but his first sighting of this new special someone was no where near as exciting. The _ truly_ exhilarating experience was the one he felt in his chest when the man turned around, adjusted his gold rimmed glasses and gave him a sweet smile.

Roman was lovestruck.

He assumed so, at least, as a rhyme fell from his lips and Thomas turned to stare in confusion. It certainly made sense, he decided, as the man in the pink cardigan tilted his head delicately and whispered something into his host’s ear.

He  wanted to be lovestruck, that much he knew. He wanted something like his brother’s, something more than the tug at his heartstrings that he felt every time Thomas fell for a new guy. He wanted love because it felt  right .

So he locked eyes with the man in the pink sweater while Thomas tried the same. He wiggled his eyebrows and tried to get a point across as Thomas dropped his head into his hands. He grinned in satisfaction as he got his new crush to laugh, and felt a warmth in his chest grow, a feeling that was beautiful and powerful, and felt much better than the bare scraps of love Thomas’ crushes let him feel.

“Talk to him!” Roman would hum, hoping the interaction would get him closer.

“Just walk up!” He huffed as Virgil pushed Thomas away.

And perhaps it was selfish, to want Thomas to spend time with someone just because of the pretty boy that came with him, but Roman felt something so  pretty bubble up in him when the side so much as glanced his way, and he thought that maybe -  _maybe_ \- he’d let himself be selfish this one time.

Then Thomas went to the washroom and stared at himself and talked and _spoke from his heart_ and everything Roman and Virgil has asked him to do and Roman felt something else, so unlike the feeling he’d become used to, build up in his chest that hurt so, so,  _so_ much more than it should’ve, and he wondered if he was doing something wrong.

A man came out of the washroom stall, and Thomas lied, and Roman felt the lump in his throat grow.

Virgil got upset, and Thomas was rude, and Roman felt his eyes prick with tears.

Thomas’ crush - Nico, they learned - was alone now. No handsome man in gold rimmed library glasses and a pink sweater and a sun stitched onto his breast.

Thomas and Nico sat down to talk, and Roman felt his heart sing with Thomas’ love.

It was far more dull of a song than he remembered.

* * *

2.

The second time Roman saw Pretty Pink was when Thomas and Nico went on their first proper date. It was a simple date, only a walk along a trail in the cold afternoon. It was fall now (Or “Halloween: The month,” as Virgil had dubbed it), and the leaves were slowly changing color, giving a lovely new look to the trail’s normally green and brown theme.

“It’s prettier now,” Logan said, curled up on the side of the couch, a heavy blanket tossed over him.

Roman nodded from the kitchen as Virgil made a noise of vague agreement from his spot lying face down on the other half of the sofa.

Roman brought himself over to the living room, mug of hot chocolate warming his hands, and kicked Virgil’s thigh lightly.

“Move,” he hummed, bringing the mug to his lips and taking a loud, if not impatient, sounding sip (Virgil likely wasn’t paying much attention, so it probably hadn’t gotten across, but it was the thought that counted).

Virgil turned to look at him, eyebrows raised. “Sit,” he said, getting a bit more comfortable. “I need the weight.”

Roman shrugged and plopped himself down onto Virgil’s lower back and crisscrossed his legs.

He looked at the tv screen, with it’s wonderful view of the beautiful trees and Thomas’ very focused view of Nico and his red face (Roman liked to think it was because Thomas had made him blush with a smooth pickup line, but his whole was a terrible flirt, so it was far more likely to be from the cold).

Something danced just out of Thomas’ vision though, and Roman furrowed his brows and took a quick sip of his hot chocolate-

-and nearly spit it out when Rainbows and Sunshine stepped into frame. He looked exactly the same as he did last time Roman saw him, except this time he was  closer , and as such,  prettier , and making it a lot harder to choke down his drink then it should’ve been.

Roman held his mug up with one hand, hoping to keep any of it’s contents from spilling out, and pressed his other fist to his mouth, coughing heavily into it. His throat burned, and he grimaced, rubbing it carefully.

“Holy shit, Roman,” Virgil said, trying to look back at him. “Are you good?”

Roman shrugged, forcing up another cough in hopes of it clearing his airway. “It’s nothing, really, I’m just- surprised.”

Both Logan and Virgil stared at him for an awkward moment, before looking at each other and sharing a silent conversation. Roman looked very deliberately at the screen (and maybe also at the pretty guy walking with Thomas and Nico, although if his eyes happened to catch, that wasn’t on him) rather than his two fellow sides.

“Surprised,” Logan said dryly, his mouth quirking up into a smirk as he looked over at the tv and the two very similar looking men on it.

“Yeah,” Roman squeaked, sounding far less confident in himself as he saw Virgil glance at the tv, Logan, and him in slowly dawning realization.

“You have a crush,” Virgil breathed, looking extremely excited for some (hopefully non blackmail related) reason.

Roman looked at the inside of his mug rather than at his friends and hummed a noncommittal sound. All it took was one glance up at the tv screen while Pretty Pink looked Thomas in the eyes, and Roman buried his face in his free hand in hopes of covering his blush.

He wasn’t sure it was working.

Logan grinned. “Oh, I can’t wait till your brother gets back, he’s going to love this.”

Virgil rolled himself out from under Roman, falling off the couch in the process. “Hey, I don’t mean to like, be a jerk or anything, but I think this is really cute and as your best friend-“ Roman made a quiet sound of mild disagreement. “-It’s my job to make fun of you for this.” Roman made another, far louder and offended, sound of disagreement.

Roman shook his head. “There is totally something a problem with this relationship, and I don’t know what it is, but Logan is going to tell me and it’s going to make it so that you _do not_ get to make fun of me.”

Logan snorted. “Absolutely not. This is your crush, and as little as I want to get involved with your love life, I think you should go for it.” He grinned down at the green stone that hung from his necklace. “It’s what got your brother and I together, so I’m certainly going to give the advice I can to you.”

Roman made a whining noise and Virgil hummed sympathetically.

“It really sucks to suck man,” he said comfortingly, though the words weren’t as kind as Roman thought they could’ve been. Virgil looked over towards the front door with a grin. “I do really enjoy the thought of you just going outside and saying something real quick, but you’re very nervous right now, it’s cold outside, and I’m starting to think you’re ceasing to function.”

Virgil was right, because of course he was. Roman glancing at the tv every three seconds to look at Nico’s side was turning his brain to lovestruck mush. And with mush for brains, Roman’s supposedly carefully crafted defense was a weak, “He’s very pretty.”

Virgil snorted. “Okay, lovebird, I think that’s enough of Thomas’ date for you. Next time I see that guy, I’m shoving your ass out the front door to greet him though, got it?”

Roman sighed as the tv clicked off, but shrugged none the less. “I’m not going out there without a fight, I hope you know.”

Both Logan and Virgil laughed, the latter elbowing Roman in the side. “I know! It wouldn’t be you if you didn’t.”

* * *

3.

The third time Roman saw his crush was when he was with Patton. 

Padre was trying (and failing) to make cookies, often misreading the instructions and adding too much of something. 

The tv was on in the living room, showing Nico and Janus sitting on the edge of Thomas’ bed as the man himself recited his lines for the new play.

Part of Roman wanted to be out there, but he and Janus were in a bit of a fight, one that neither of them were interested in apologizing for. At some point they’d settled on a switching schedule, changing who got to be Thomas’ critic every time he practiced (Roman was quite sure they’d gotten to a point where neither him nor Janus would actually be upset with the other should they work together, but it would be awkward, and he didn’t much feel like dealing with that).

Roman grinned as Patton managed to spray batter in his face, slipping off the counter to try and help wipe a droplet off his face. “Take a break, padre, I don’t know if the kitchen can take any more of this,” Roman laughed.

Patton frowned at the flower and sugar scattered across the counter and his arms. “This is true. I  do really want cookies though.” He turned to look at Roman as he snapped his fingers to get rid of the mess. “Can you summon some? The ones you summon always taste  great .” 

Roman put a hand to his chest. “How kind of you!” He brought his other hand up as a tray materialized on it and bowed down to reveal the perfectly crisped cookies to Patton. 

Patton giggled and took one of the still warm snacks, taking a bite and giving Roman a thumbs up. “It’s awesome!” 

Roman smiled in return. “Now, let’s eat these on the couch and see what mistakes we can catch Thomas make.” Patton nodded enthusiastically, though Roman was pretty sure it was at the prospect of eating cookies in the warmth of the couch. 

“Actually,” Roman handed the tray to Patton, “Go sit on the couch, and I’ll make coffee.” As the fatherly side dropped onto the couch and began creating a nest for himself Roman called to him, “Oh! Tell me if anything interesting comes up!”

Patton only just finished touching up his area when he stared at the screen, confused, and hummed, “Roman, something interesting just _pop_ ped up.” 

Roman rolled the phrase through his mind, wondering if there was a pun hidden inside, and glanced at the tv screen, took a double take, and squealed. 

He was there. He was  _there_.  _He_ was there. 

It was his nameless crush, sitting beside his whole and watching Thomas fumble over his words. Amusement shone in his eyes, and he leaned over to whisper something to Nico, making the human stand up and ask Thomas for the script. 

Janus looked over at the other side, tilting his head to examine him. 

Roman and Patton, on the other side of the tv screen, were in chaos. Roman was avoiding looking at anything but the coffee, blush deepening every second that passed. Patton was staring at the tv, mouth running a mile a minute. 

“Is that-? Roman is that the guy Virgil was telling me about? Is that the guy you have a crush on? Am I supposed to push you out the door? Virgil told me that was what  he was going to do but I don’t really want to. Should you go out and talk to him? Wait actually, for sure, for sure, that’s your crush-?” 

Roman buried his face in his hands as Nico grinned and told Thomas he would read the other character’s lines. “Patton,” the princely side groaned, “I’m this close to combusting.” He held up a hand and held his fingers so they almost touched. 

Patton blinked, then covered his mouth. “Oops!” He gasped through his hands. 

Roman waved him off. “It’s whatever, but I’d much rather watch Thomas’ mediocre acting skills then discuss this with you.” 

“Don’t you mean watch your new  cru -“

“ _ Patton _ !”

Patton giggled, leaning back into the couch and stuffing a cookie in his mouth. There was a moment of silence, just long enough to make it feel awkward, and Patton turned to Roman and opened his mouth.

Janus, on the tv, cut him off. 

“Who are you?”

Both Patton and Roman snapped to attention as the other side blinked in surprise. “Oh, me? My name’s Carmen! I’m Nico’s creativity.” 

Roman bounced, excitement running through his veins as Janus held his hand out. “My name is Janus. I’m Thomas’ deceit.” 

Carmen smiled. “It’s nice to meet you, Janus!” 

“Absolutely _dreadful_ to meet you too,” Janus hummed, letting Carmen sort out the sarcasm. 

Carmen paused, and Roman and Patton exchanged disappointed glances. Roman couldn’t help but flap his hands when his crush spoke next. “Do you know of a side wearing all white with a red sash?” 

Janus carefully didn’t react, but his lips tilted up and he leaned back. “Oh? Are you looking for Roman?” 

Carmen nodded. “I want to talk to him.” A hand came up to play with the chain on his glasses. “He looks like a fun person to be around, you know?”

“He’s certainly exuberant,” Janus agreed. “Do you want me to tell him something for you?” 

Carmen looked down at his hands for a moment, contemplative. “No, no I don’t think so. I just want to talk, face to face.” His eyes flickered up to where Thomas and Nico were giggling, faces close. “Thank you for the offer though, Janus.” 

Janus didn’t respond, looking at Carmen carefully. After a pause, he narrowed his eyes in almost suspicion, but said nothing, only relaxing in his spot.

“Have a good day, Carmen,” Janus said, standing up swiftly. “I highly doubt Thomas will be doing any proper acting anymore.” He walked over to the door and lay a hand on the doorknob, pausing. “I’ll make sure Roman comes out next time he sees you out here.” 

Carmen smiled. “I can’t wait to meet him.”

Janus tipped his hat and opened the door, shutting it quietly behind him. He turned around, freezing when he saw Patton and Roman’s eyes on him. There was a minute of awkward silence before Janus marched toward the stairs. “You better have heard that, Roman.”

Roman blinked. “Was- Did you do that for me?” 

Janus snorted. “Of  _course_ not, Roman, I’m  _definitely_ the type for small talk with some random side.” 

Janus made his way up the stairs and out of view, and Roman recognized his attempt at an apology. It wasn’t a sorry, but it was Janus trying to reconcile. The least Roman could do in return was meet Carmen next time he saw him.

* * *

4.

That next time ended up being about a week later, when Roman was laughing with his brother and Logan. They were in the living room, the tv turned on for background noise and a nest of pillows strewn about the floor for Roman’s comfort. 

“Remus!” Roman snorted, attempting to pull yet another pillow from the mustached menace’s hands. “Remus, give me the pillow!”

Remus gave a sharp tug, sending Roman tumbling face first into the couch. “No,” he said, grinning.

Logan pulled his boyfriend closer to him, angling in for a kiss, and stealing the pillow when Remus went soft. 

Roman cackled at his brother’s pout. “You know what?” He asked, falling back into his pile of fluff. “I’m gonna let Logan have it.” 

Remus gasped in mock hurt, even as his mouth twitched up into a smile. “How could you? First my brother! Then my boyfriend! And then my brother again!” 

Roman rolled over onto his stomach to look at the tv. “Sucks to be you I guess,” he sang.

Remus leaned back, crossing his arms. “It  does suck to be me,” he whined. 

Logan pulled his boyfriend close, cuddling into him. “The pillow was a trap to get you to cuddle me,” he hummed into Remus’s chest.

Remus grinned. “Well then! Consider me trapped!”

There was a pause as Remus and Logan curled into each other, and Roman inspected the tv. He watched Nico as he leaned over the desk, pencil scratching. 

He wondered if Carmen would come out soon. 

“Hey, guys,” Roman hummed, eyes still on the screen. “What did you do when you found out you liked each other?” 

Logan shifted to look at him. “We talked it out. Why?”

Remus laughed. “You kissed me and then said that you’d wanted to do that for a year. My response was ‘same.’ That’s not talking it out.”

Roman turned to look back at the two. “I feel like despite the fact that you’re the only couple I can ask, you’re the exact wrong people to talk to.” 

Logan sighed. “I think you might be right. We’re disasters.” 

Remus nodded. “Hell yeah, but,” he turned to look at his brother. “Why do you ask?” 

Logan looked Roman over for a second before shooting up with a gasp. “I didn’t tell you about Roman’s crush yet!” 

The twins froze simultaneously. 

Remus tackled his brother with a shout, finding himself sitting cross-legged on the other side’s back. “You didn’t tell me about your  crush? ” He huffed, flicking his brother between the eyes. “That’s illegal.” 

Roman shrugged, glaring at Logan. “Be gay, do crime, right?” 

Logan smiled. “Remus, come here, let me hug you, and we’re going to talk about Roman’s crush.” 

Roman whined loudly as Remus settled himself in Logan’s arms. “You guys better not make fun of me,” he said, looking back at the tv.

“Don’t worry,” Remus sang, “We will!”

Logan sat his chin on his boyfriend’s shoulder, a laugh rumbling from his throat. “So first, you need to know is that it’s not any of us.” 

Remus nodded, looking confused, but patting Logan’s leg. “That’s fair, the hottest side is already taken.”

Logan grinned. “Not a celebrity crush either!” 

Remus tilted his head, brows furrowed. “Wait,  not a celeb crush?” 

Roman narrowed his eyes. “Are you dragging this out on purpose or are you torturing me on accident?” 

Logan huffed. “Come on, let me have this.” He waited a beat. “Anyway, it’s one of Nico’s sides. The creative one, I think.” 

Remus blinked. “Wait, you’ve seen Nico’s sides?” He stared at the tv, eyes narrowed. “Is it him?”

Roman turned around, eyes falling onto Carmen, sitting on the counter of Thomas’ kitchen, watching whatever Thomas and Nico had put on the tv to cuddle to. A strangled noise escaped his throat and he buried his face into his knees. 

“Oh-“ Remus said, surprised. “He’s, like- gay.” 

Logan snorted. “He’s never even met him properly.” 

Roman groaned, flipping off the boyfriends. “I don’t want to yet.” Far more muffled: “I’m scared.”

Remus frowned, reaching an arm up as if to put it on his brother’s shoulder. He stole it back after a moment of hesitation. 

“Hey, Ro-bro,” Remus tried, “You wanna hear a story?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “Okay, so there were these two guys who were  really fucking gay for each other but they didn’t talk too much. Why? Because they were _dumb_.” 

Logan made a noise of disagreement. 

“Because the system was rigged so they couldn’t see each other often,” Remus amended. “So at one point, when they had the chance, they decided to have a talk. Nothing bad, nothing good, just spending time with each other. It was whatever they wanted.”

Logan squeezed his boyfriend tight, nuzzling his head into the crook of his neck. “It wasn’t big, it wasn’t really special, or anything like that, but...” Logan paused. “They knew where they stood with each other. It was the first step in their relationship and it meant that they could do everything else, could escalate to more. It was because they did that one talk first.” He sighed, a hand coming up to play with a lock of Remus’ hair. “Everything we are right now, it’s because of a  talk , Roman. It’s important that you can communicate with him comfortably, because you need it.” He brought his hand down to clasp with his boyfriend’s. “You need to talk to him, Roman. Please.” 

Roman looked up at them, close physically and emotionally and tried to imagine himself in their place. With Carmen wrapped around him and their clasped hands and just knowing, without a doubt, that they loved each other. That they trusted each other, that they cared. 

He found, with a jolt of surprise, that he couldn’t. 

He couldn’t because they were  right . He needed to take a first step, a step outside his comfort zone (and hopefully into Carmen’s arms). He needed to talk to him. 

“Hey guys?” Roman looked up at his friends, eyes shining with hope. “Thank you. I’m gonna talk to him.” 

Remus grinned, squeezing Logan’s hand. “Go get him Ro!” He squealed, leaning into his boyfriend. 

Logan, from behind him, nodded at Roman. “Have fun,” he said, a soft smile gracing his face.

Roman walked out the front door, listening as Logan and Remus joked to each other behind him. 

“Oh wow, they just- they grow up so fast-“ 

“Yes, your brother is certainly growing a pair.” 

Roman closed the door behind him, smiling. He knew they were proud of him. Now he just wanted to do something to earn that pride.

* * *

5.

The fifth time Roman saw Carmen, he was star struck. Seeing him through a tv screen or from across a cafeteria was so different from now, only feet apart, with nothing but empty air between them. Carmen, here, now, in the dark of the 9:00 night,  _glowed_. His hair seemed to emit it’s own light, a soft pink casting shadows around the room. 

He turned to look at Roman and the princely side’s breath caught in his throat. His  _eyes_ , a deep, beautiful, chocolate brown before, were bright, sparkling like cider, and looked like a million different colors reflecting off of each other. Rimmed with gold glasses, he made Roman think of copper - under appreciated but so, so, pretty. 

Roman smiled softly, walking forward until he stood in front of Carmen. He pat the spot next to him. “May I sit here?” 

Carmen nodded, lips pulling into a smile, freckles shifting, reflecting their own light. There was a moment of silence, and then Carmen spoke. “You’re glowing.” When Roman looked over, Carmen flushed, looking down at his hands. “I know it sounds weird but-“ he snuck a hand over to grasp at Roman’s in a light grip. When Roman made no move to stop him, he pulled their interlocked hands up, Roman noticing the soft trails of pink that followed Carmen’s fingertips. “You  _shine_.” Roman realized after a moment that Carmen seemed to think that it was  him who was glowing. Perhaps he was right. 

Roman let out a quiet laugh, whispering, “Bright like a diamond!” 

He took Carmen’s hand carefully, bringing it down to look at the glitter painted nails. “You’re glowing too, you know?” His eyes were drawn back to the light in his hair. “The tips of your hair, your freckles, your eyes...” he trailed off, a warmth in his chest growing.

Carmen smiled. “You’re a bit of a poet, aren’t you?” 

Roman leaned forward, embarrassed. “Sometimes, if I have a sort of muse.” 

Carmen sat there for a moment, processing Roman’s words before letting out a squeak. “You-!” He curled into himself, falling into a fit of giggles. 

Roman smiled at Carmen’s flustered state before tilting his head with a small frown. “I just realized something, you know.” Carmen paused, looking over. “I’ve never properly introduced myself.” 

Roman stood up and took one of Carmen’s hands in his own, bowing down to touch Carmen’s hand to his lips. “It’s wonderful to meet you, my good sir, and it would be my greatest wish fulfilled if you could tell me your name.” 

Roman knew his name already, of course, thanks to Janus, but he wanted to hear it here, now, spoken to  him for the first time. “My name is Carmen,” he hummed, pulling his hand, interlaced with Roman’s, to his chest. “Now, my prince, would you be willing to tell me yours?” 

“Roman,” the side said quietly, distracted by their sudden closeness. 

There was a moment of silence, before Carmen’s face split into a grin. “Oh my gosh, that was just like out of a Disney movie-“ he giggled pulling Roman an inch closer. 

Roman gasped. “You like Disney movies?” He grinned, a squeal building in his throat, and the former tension disappeared, swapping for bright eyed excitement.

Carmen clapped his hands together, laughing. “Of course! What’s your favorite? Mine is probably  Finding Dory , but only because Nico has been watching it a lot lately.”

Roman flapped his hands in excitement, mouth opening and spilling out everything he knew about the four movies he thought might’ve been his favorite in that moment. 

When Carmen’s eyes shone with interest rather than boredom, Roman thought he could tell him he loved him, just like that. He didn’t though, preferring this easy talk about whatever they wanted to anything that might have happened should he say something wrong like that.

They talked for hours, their excitement never dulling, conversation only stopping when Nico leaned up to kiss Thomas with a quiet, “It’s late, I should go.” 

There was no kiss, no confession, not there and not then. They’d only  just properly met, after all. But it was love, and they both knew it. 

It was going somewhere, because they’d taken that first step.

**Author's Note:**

> A few headcanons used for this story!  
> -The sides live in a house that looks like Thomas' apartment  
> -The sides call Thomas their whole  
> -Roman and Virgil are best friends


End file.
